Wednesday, May 11, 2016

EMOTIONAL IS MY MIDDLE NAME


some days, most days, i feel pretty tough emotionally but then there are days like yesterday where i'm literally on the verge of crying about everything all day long.  can you relate? i think by about the third time of the day that i found tears springing to my eyes about something senseless i was like LOOK BODY, THIS IS NOT PMSing SO WHAT IS THIS? get it together. 

for example, coopers school sent home a note about paying a payment towards the registration fee for next year saying i had only paid X amount when i have actually paid three times that.  it frustrated me so i guess that's why i needed to cry about it? or maybe i was embarrassed thinking that they thought i haven't been paying? either way it was easily solved by a note back to the school.

example two, i took cooper to the park for about thirty minutes before dinner and there were a bunch of boy scouts there running around.  cooper was minding his own going up and down the slide when a little boy, probably six years old, started saying "you're a little lady" to him over and over again.  cooper kept telling him "no, i'm a boy!" i let it go on for a minute or so and then i finally told the boy he needed to stop being mean because cooper is obviously a boy.  it's totally wrong to say and feel this way.... but have you ever wanted to hurt a little kid? (insert nervous face emoji here) (insert raising hand emoji here).  along with that horrible thought came the one where i briefly thought i would rather cooper be the mean one than be picked on.  awful i know but darnnit, why would someone pick on an innocent three year old? kids are mean and i'm definitely going to struggle with this aspect of him getting older.

don't pick on my baby!

so it's now 10:23am and i've yet to have the urge to cry once today so far so i think today might be a better day, emotionally speaking you know. 

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