I saw today where a sweet fellow blogger posted about the discontentment of life, so to speak, while waiting to get married and it made me realize that while I am so happy with so many aspects of my life, I do have discontentment about the fact that I am not already to the next stage of life where I want to be so badly. And it's okay. It does not mean that I am not grateful for what I do have, it simply means I have it in my heart to be more and to have more. I pray daily that the pieces will move how they need to and fall where they need to so that things will keep progressing and I can eventually get to where my heart so badly desires to be. It seems like everyday another friend/family member/or acquaintance is getting engaged or married and sometimes when I see it, I feel nothing but happiness for them but there are times where I'm green with envy too. A lot of the time I feel guilty for not being "fully satisfied" but I'm starting to see and realize that's OKAY! I am not greedy or childish or any other slew of negative things because I want more for me and Coopers life.
Yesterday we attended my cousins wedding. It had been a few years since I'd attended a wedding and I teared up + got goosebumps over ten times throughout the ceremony and reception. I LOVE love, ya'll. There's nothing like seeing two people so madly in love choosing each other for the rest of their lives. Several people made toasts and through each one I learned more and more about both the bride and the groom and what they are to each other, through the eyes of others, and it was so refreshing. It reconfirmed the things that I've always stood convicted in. I almost saw myself and my own heart in a new light.
My wedding date sure was handsome wasn't he? eric had to work so cooper gladly stepped in ;)
Lastly, i think i'm going to unfollow the "Scary Mommy" Facebook page. I read a good article once that someone had shared so I decided to follow their page and now I have at least five "articles" showing up on my feed daily that I don't normally read, but I do always get sucked into the comments. I think it is those articles and those comments sections that bring mothers and people in general down. I don't care how other people do things or what other people thing about how I do things. I love my boy the most out of any living person on this planet and I will always do my best for him, that's plenty enough for us.